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}VANDALIZM = Very Awesome News Direct from America’s Lamest Zine Maker{ 
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Issue 2 - April 10th, 2024

Hello again, motherfucker! Welcome back to VANDALIZM! Or, if you're a new reader, hello, motherfucker!
Welcome to VANDALIZM! Now let's start this shit, bitch!
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I've noticed that there's a grammar mistake or something in issue 1, which was "Why is it capitalized, 
you're probably asking as if I could talk to you through a text file.". It should be 
""Why is it capitalized?", you're probably asking as if I could talk to you through a text file.". I 
apologize to any nerds I didn't offend. I'm probably making punctuation mistakes or whatever now but
I honestly don't care. I won't fix any more stuff.
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Cool Fucking Sword of Extreme Death

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I saw a solar eclipse 2 days ago (not with my bare eyes like a dumbass). I don't get why people like
looking at an orange circle that slowly becomes less visible. Yes, it doesn't happen often, and you can
get some cool photos, but why is an orange shape so interesting to people? Who the fuck cares that it's
a rare opportunity to see a circle get covered? Humans are weird. And yes, I missed the totality.
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Jokes:

Q: What do you call a homeless person? 
A: A broke idiot that doesn't know any useful skills!

Q: How do you kill a child?
A: You shove their whiny ass into a medieval torture device!

Q: What color is the sky in Senegal?
A: I don't know. Probably something stupid. Like brown. Or chartreuse.

Weren't those so funny? I almost died laughing! What? You don't get it? You know what they say, good
humor is like clean water, not everyone gets it.
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How to kill yourself painlessly:

1. Get a nitrogen tank.
2. Open it and put your mouth on it.
3. Wait until you die.
4. Die.
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Jimmy and Person #1

Jimmy: Hello Person!
Person: Hello Johnny! Nice day today!
Jimmy: It sure is! Wanna go shoot up a school?
Person: Sure!

(They go to Dumbass School for the Mentally Retarded)

Jimmy: Hey bitches! Give me your fucking money or I'll stick a gun up your asshole!
Student 1: No, please! Here, take all of it!
Jimmy: Thanks! Now die, cunt!

(Jimmy kills that fatass student)

Person: Everyone, give us your damn money or I'll kill you, even though I will either way!
Jimmy: Please be kind and give us your money before we kill you though, that would be nice.
Student 2: Why?
Jimmy: Shut up, fag!

(Jimmy shoots him)

Jimmy: Now then, let the games begin.

(They kill everyone within a 6-mile radius and get $8,296,423)

Person: Well, that was certainly enjoyable, let's do it again sometime!
Jimmy: Sure! Now, what shall we do with all the money?
Person: Let's give it to charity!
Both: Yay!

(They go to the place with the thing)

Person: So, what charity should we donate it to?
Jimmy: How about this one? Their cause is to stop gun violence in schools.
Person: That's a great idea!

(They lived crappily ever after. The End. Fin. And now our song is done)
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Well, that's the end of that one, bitch! See you next time!
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VANDALIZM - https://vandalizm.neocities.org
If you have any ideas, requests or advice for the zine, email me at vandalizmguy@gmail.com.
If you have any complaints, kill yourself.